Cats, Dogs, Bicycles and Biscuits

by Sarah on April 12, 2011

I’m a cat-person. And as you’ll no doubt be aware, training a cat is nigh impossible. A cat adopts you, and then proceeds to do exactly as it pleases.

Remind anyone of a woman with the key to her man’s chastity belt?

John, on the other hand loves dogs.

He takes biscuits when he’s out on his bike and always stops to say “hello” and give the mutts a treat (it also means the farm-dogs, of which there are many, very quickly learn the better reward comes from not chasing Bicycling Biscuit Man but giving him a paw instead).

All very easy, really: give them what they want, and they’ll do what he wants.

And men are the same when it comes to male chastity.

Let me explain: a lady emailed me yesterday, and in a nutshell the problem is thus: “But the issue is… he is backing out when faced with him actually getting a piercing and a Lori device for real. Don’t know what to do now… yes, he knows I DO intend to give him this experience if he give over the control

Well, like a dog, your man needs training. I don’t mean in a Femdom sense, unless that’s what you’re into, but as I go into in some detail in Be Careful What You Wish For, male chastity is hard work for YOU, too. And it’s reasonable for you to get what you want if you’re working to give him what he wants.

Easiest thing to do is refuse to play at all. Tell him if he wants to play the male chastity game you’ll play too if… and ONLY if he keeps to the rules you set.

Refuse even to talk about it, because that gets him off, too, no doubt (but don’t use sex or affection as a currency — again, that’s something I discuss further, but suffice it to say it often causes resentment in the long term). I understand his stalling… there’s a good reason it’s called Be Careful What You Wish For, after all.

So maintain your sang froid. If he really wants that particular biscuit, then he’ll give you that paw, no question.

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