Well… here’s what I want from male chastity:

Here he is… all mine (and read what he has to say about that in this week’s Newsletter).

Yummy. It doesn’t actually do him justice — the belt scrunches up his belly a little. He looks much harder and better naked…

I finally managed to persuade him to pose, albeit reluctantly for a pic this morning, using the wheedling girly excuse Tom and Thumper pose for HNT, so it’d be a shame to be outdone by those coves, wouldn’t it?

Now, I — we, I should say — didn’t get here by luck, happy circumstance or outrageous good fortune. No, we got here because John was smart enough to realise if he didn’t ask for what he wanted, the chances of him getting it were slim. I’d have had to be some kind of mind-reader to get the hints he might have otherwise dropped.

And let’s face it… getting a hint about something you’re completely unaware and ignorant of would be One Almighty Feat in itself.

Clear communication is the key.

See, I had a message this morning from a chap who’s doing very well in getting into the male chastity lifestyle, but he then said this:

“Sarah, a quick note…you’re encouragement and ‘woman’s point of view’ has helped tremendously.  I have now gone a solid week in continuous locked mode, but with the key always in my wife’s bathroom drawer… right next to the aspirin.

I told her three days ago, jokingly, ‘Honey, if this is going to work the way it’s supposed to, you’re can’t ‘hide’ the key in plain sight!’

Every day, as I would check, the key would still be there, indicating, to me, that she was not really on-board with this project…not really motivated to exploit the control I’m trying to give her.  I looked again last night, and the key was gone.  Now we’re gettin’ somewhere!  Thank you!”

Now, kudos to him for getting this far. Good job, an’ all that.

But it does go to show you can never afford to assume someone else — even your partner — actually knows what you mean when you drop these hints about male chastity.

She might have other things on her mind, might not hear you, might thing you’re just messing… or she simply might not know what you’re on about. And there is a small chance she’ll get the idea she’s doing something wrong but have no idea what it could be.

And there, gentle reader, as I’m sure you’ll recognise, lies the seed of a misunderstanding that simmers and festers and blows up unpredictably at some point in the future. I’m not exaggerating — you know it happens, don’t you?

And the thing about control is it both has to be given and it has to be accepted. You can’t just give it to her unilaterally. She’s got to know it’s there to be taken, and then she has to take it. If she’s unsure about it, she won’t.

So, how much smoother — and quicker — would it have been if he’d said something like:

“Honey, how would you feel about keeping the key so I don’t know where it is? The device is comfortable now and I can always ask you for it if I really need it. I’d really like you to take it so I can’t just get it whenever I want to. It’s always a temptation and I want my only temptation to be YOU”

This isn’t rocket science, either.

It’s a valuable life-skill that’ll serve you well in many situations, not just male chastity.

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