Hell Hath No Fury

by Sarah on May 8, 2011

Apparently…

.…sometimes…

.…temptation can be just a liiiitle too much.

Or at least it was for one reader who wrote to me yesterday and said:

Sarah I am K. husband and yesterday we went for dinner and when we got back we went to the bathroom I took a bath and she used the toilet she took of her chain with the  and forget it there. I was bathing for some time and when l were done I found the key. I did go and see were K. was and open my self and cum.  Later that night I told here and she said she will not be cross if I tell her.  Before we went to bed she said that she can’t trust me and she don’t want go on with the chastity. She want me to take it of an throw it away. I don’t want to do it please give advise. ~ P”

Oh dear.

I can imagine how this was too tempting, and, while I don’t know your own, specific, reasons for playing at male chastity, I do know many men want it to curb their masturbation habit — and if that’s the case here, then this result is hardly surprising.

It’s understandable she should feel let down, especially if you’ve sold her on the idea of male chastity being about her control — it’s a bit like you’ve given her a present and taken it away.

We women are sensitive to that kind of thing in the main — remember, one of the effects of male chastity is to increase the emotional intimacy between you.

To her it’s probably not about the orgasm you had — it’s more likely to be about the intimacy she feels you’ve somehow either violated or trivialised.

I know you might not see it that way (men usually don’t), and it’s not what you intended, but she feels how she feels and to a large extent she can’t help that.

But she can help how she reacts to it. And while her reaction is understandable, it’s a bit extreme. I write in Be Careful What You Wish For, elsewhere on the Blog and in the free guide, male chastity is supposed to be fun.

It’s serious fun, to be sure, but the opposite of fun isn’t serious — it’s solemn. And I think being too solemn and po‐faced about it takes the fun away. Angry and upset as she’s feeling right now, it really doesn’t have to be a big deal unless she makes it one.

You might have some talking and making up to do, and while it’s possible she might stick to her guns and not want to play any more, it’s likely she’ll come round. One thing that’s really important is for you to accept the responsibility for it.

I’m not suggesting you’re NOT doing this, just warning you against doing what a lot of people do and try to turn the blame around by saying something like, “it’s YOUR fault for leaving the key there”. As I say, I’m not suggesting you’ve done or would do that.

Ultimately, you know her better than I do, but my guess is it might just take a bit of time, is all. You just might have to sit down, have The Conversation again and then earn that trust back again.

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