Keeping Male Chastity Fun

by Sarah on September 30, 2010

After last week’s male chastity Newsletter in which John revealed his… erm… “accident”, setting back our record attempt at a year in male chastity and orgasm denial back to square one, I had an email from Jody who said:

Hi Sarah,

Great newsletter and a real shame about John! I have similar troubles with my hubby and it sometimes makes me mad because it feels like he’s disobeying my rules. How can I stop this and what punishments work that you are going to do to John?


Well, I hate to disappoint you, Jody, but I don’t get mad, I don’t feel much like he’s disobeying me and there won’t be any punishments.

And his breaking your rules for male chastity doesn’t make you mad. Your emotions are your own responsibility.

First, the Golden Rule:

Male Chastity is Only a Game!

And while I take games, including male chastity, seriously (I’m actually much more competitive than he is, although he says he’s not competitive because he’s the best at everything, and I’m not entirely sure he’s not being serious when he says it… but I digress), I don’t get solemn and uptight about them.

Bearing that in mind, let me answer the points in order.

male chastity

Why Get Mad about Breaking Male Chastity?

First, and I really learned a lot of this from John, getting mad at other people’s mistakes is often counterproductive.

Not only does it leave you and the other person feeling rotten – especially if you’ve said things you didn’t mean or didn’t mean in the way they took them – but it does nothing to solve the problem and actually focuses your attention and theirs on it.

In my opinion you’re better off looking for a solution and then, if it’s appropriate, look to point the finger. In fact, and another gem from Himself, is the notion of taking responsibility for all solutions no matter who is at fault. Get your ego out of the way and set to work – it makes life a lot better in the end.

Besides, in this case, any “blame” was probably 50/50 anyway.

And what’s the big deal, really?

Which leads me to my second point…

His Disobeying My “Rules” on Male Chastity

John isn’t a child or a slave, not even a make-believe one. We play at male chastity — that’s all.

All that’s happened is he’s had an orgasm when we were playing a game in which the rules say he can’t.

And… what does that mean?

Not a lot.

It was an accident, and one we both could have prevented by paying a little more attention to the “rules” and his state of arousal at the time.

It’s not as if he’s violated my individual sovereignty by, say, slapping me, stealing my property, opening my letters or checking my emails or text messages, is it?

He’s had a perfectly normal physiological reaction to sexual stimulation.

In the grand scheme of things, it’s so insignificant as to be almost unworthy of mention. In fact, we laughed about it for a long time.

And finally…

Male Chastity and Punishment

This just isn’t something we do since we’re not in a female-led or female-dominated relationship.

I’m not into causing John the kind of pain or discomfort the word “punishment” implies, because by definition it would have to be something he didn’t actually enjoy – else it wouldn’t be punishment, right?

So denying him orgasm, giving him cruel T&D, or locking him for an extended period wouldn’t cut it, since he actually wants those things.

The way to “punish” him would be not to deny him, not to T&D him, and not to lock him in male chastity.

But since I like those things, too, I’d be punishing myself and for what reason?

I’m not picking at you or making fun of you – but to me it seems you’re going to enjoy your games a little more if you relax a bit.

Male chastity is just a bit of fun, remember?

P.S. Remember to check out Thumper’s new male chastity forum. At last… someone with a male chastity forum dedicated to reality sanity instead of fiction and nuttiness!

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