Male Chastity, Marriage and Spineless Men

by Sarah on May 11, 2010

Mmm… what a weekend. Before we discovered male chastity marriage was pretty good… but now it’s just… sublime.

Excuse my using coarse language so early in this post, but there’s simply no other way to describe it: fucking amazing.

As my regular readers will be aware, this weekend was John’s weekend off, a rare weekend when he gets to orgasm at will, as often as he likes for two or three days. Which is exactly what happened this weekend just gone, and I can happily report it was every bit as hot, wet, slippery and intense as it always is.

We went away to a hotel in the South for the weekend to make it even more special, and it was truly fabulous. I hope only the people in the rooms adjacent (and down the hall, to be honest, because John was neither quiet nor subtle in sharing his pleasure) enjoyed the weekend as much as we did.

Interestingly, I returned yesterday to a mixed bag of messages, both from the Blog contact page and in response to the free Guide, many of which shared a similar theme: why are you allowing your husband so much freedom when he’s supposed to be in chastity?

I’m paraphrasing, but that was the gist of most of them.

And I’m sick to the back teeth of questions like this, not least because the answer is plain on almost every bloody page on the Blog.

For us, male chastity, marriage, our relationship, and all the things we do together are all part of a wider partnership. As I’ve written over and over again, it’s something we do with each other, and not something I do to John. And this is a related but entirely separate question to the one of enforced chastity.

Notwithstanding the consensually prescriptive nature of male chastity marriage is about cooperation, sharing and mutual pleasure, at least to me and to the overwhelming majority of my readers and commentators.

Yet, a recent comment by Lisa had this to say, among other things (which I’ll also come back to in a future post):

I don’t demand a lot, but I do demand total devo­tion. I think that’s the least that every woman wants.”

Well, Lisa, you think wrongly. It’s conceivable, but unlikely, I’m the only woman in the entire world who doesn’t want to demand total devotion, but even if that’s the case, this one counter example proves you objectively and unarguably wrong.

Hardly surprising, though, since experience shows overwhelmingly such blinkered, black‐and‐white ways of looking at things are misguided at best and infantile at worst.

For me, at least, “total devotion” from a man would be irritating and most unattractive. Male chastity, marriage and instant and total obedience don’t have to be bedfellows (and in practice rarely are).

And I, like most women I know, like men to be men: strong, confident, safe to be around, protective, and, crucially their own man. Yes, I push John and try it on as much as the next woman. I’ve even (to my shame, but that doesn’t stop me doing it), been known to stamp my foot.

But he doesn’t let me get away with it and I don’t want him to! A “yes man” would be about as appealing as a used condom. While the game is male chastity marriage and the partnership I share with my beloved John is the better part of my entire life.

If I told a man “do what I tell you to do, or you can pack your bags and leave”, the minute he obeyed me would be the minute I ceased to find him in the least bit desirable or attractive, because he’s no longer a man worthy of the name.

This isn’t to say I don’t have rules about what I will and will not put up with, but, crucially, those rules apply to me and my sovereignty not him and his.

In truth, the whole setup smacks of fiction, to be honest, and would be highly impractical in most marriages.

But even if it is, so what? What does it matter and who cares?

Well, I care. Because, as I’ve written on many occasions, one of the reasons for writing this Blog is to reveal the reality of male chastity and show it does not necessarily mean you have to change your personality and become some thoroughly unpleasant harridan with low self‐esteem and a sudden penchant for men with no self respect.

Male chastity, marriage, true love, mutual respect, and even the “traditional” male/female roles are fully compatible, regardless of what some fools might like to pretend.

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