I live for the moments when I get the most wonderful messages about male chastity from my readers. I get a lot of messages of all sorts, from the amusing to the frankly stupid (“forced into male chastity against my will”, anyone?. Occasionally I get some pretty nasty ones, too. Not many, and not often… but there are some very sad people out there.
But none has touched me in quite the way this one did, from “Mark”:
“I have been reading your blog for about 6 months now and have quite enjoyed it.
I initially went searching for information about teasing and discovered, not only that the world of male chastity exists, but that it was basically what I’ve been wanting for a long time.
I’ve wanted some form of control in my sex life for many years- BDSM and what not.
But with a wife as plain vanilla as there is, it was just not to be. Even after finding out about male chastity a couple of years ago, I wondered how I would ever get my wife to participate, and doubted she would.
Still, it continued to burn in me and I knew somehow, I had to have it. After two years of being so very hesitant (petrified) to bring it up, and after being encouraged by your blog, I told her all about what I was wanting to do and why. It definitely took her by surprise- the extent of it, but I had already coaxed her into some pretty serious tease and denial, so it wasn’t like it was completely new to her.
At first, she said she was okay with continuing some of the teasing, but drew the line at any kind of chastity device.
She wouldn’t even discuss it much. I’d told her I’d made a chastity device, being the resourceful guy I am, out of plastic pipe, and two inch ring and some zip ties. She didn’t want to even see it.
After a few weeks, and some really serious T&D one day, I commented I thought I should be locked up for the next 2–3 days, as she was going to be gone much of the time and I was so tempted after the teasing.
She agreed. I couldn’t believe it. So I put the device on, she checked it out, and for the next couple of days, I was in it 24 hours a day.
There’s something about having the thing on, and with her consent, or by her direction, that is so very different than just the tease and denial, and so different from just wearing it on my own. It’s got to be psychological, but there was definitely a change in me when I put it on. And it’s not even lockable — I can have it off in 5 seconds, but I didn’t want it off. I’ve always been a nice and sweet guy, but when she agreed to have me in this thing, I went looking for ways to do things for her, to be even sweeter, very attentive.
It wasn’t that I was doing it to try to get points so I could come sooner, it was because I was so overjoyed that she would play with me that I wanted to do all sorts of things for her— sort of as repayment.
And she HAS noticed, and commented that she likes all the added attention…. yet she is still hesitant to really get much into it. Why, I don’t know. She likes the new me, I love it on all levels, so I don’t see the problem.
Anyway, after a couple of days, I came out of it for a tease. I guess the sensory deprivation of even that short time had its effect because I was so sensitive to any touch. It made the tease mind-blowing.
I also noticed it felt odd to be out and I actually couldn’t wait to get it back on after we’d been together. My wife still won’t discuss the idea of buying a “real” device, nor me getting a P.A. piercing so I can be locked really good- both things I mentioned wanting when I first told her the whole story.
But I’m hoping by continuing to take it real slow and easy, she will eventually come to see the value in both of those things, and of keeping me locked pretty much 24/7 for long periods of time. (BTW, we’ve really just begun this and currently, we are just short of three weeks without orgasm. I’m asking her for at least 2 more weeks.)
Thanks for all the info and for giving me the courage to pursue this….it’s great!
I just wanted to tell you of the journey’s beginning and say, I’m 58 years old, been married for 37 years, and this is the best thing we have ever done, in my mind, to further our sex life, and our relationship in general.”
Well, I don’t mind telling you I was thrilled to receive this, and I emailed Mark back and asked if he’d allow me to share it with you here on the male chastity blog.
And this was his reply:
“I’m in a rather, shall we say, delicate position and any word of this out would not be good.
Yes, I have BCWYWF and it has been a great help.
In bringing the topic up to my wife, I used many quotes from it and from the blog. In fact, I told her I hoped I got to the place where I was saying that (BCWYWF) to myself. As you use the previous email, let me reiterate what a difference it has made in our general relationship, outside of sex.
Also, I didn’t mention, the effect on me has been like taking me back 40 years, to when I was 18 .….in more ways than one, if you catch my drift.
Also, a word of encouragement to those who are trying to figure out how to “go for it” and say, it’s worth the risk, and if like me, it’s been two years to bring it up, okay, and even if it takes a long slow process to get into the lifestyle (which it probably will), don’t give up, it’s also worth the wait.
I’ll quote you — I never want to go back to how it was. The idea of coming anytime I want is preposterous…how pedestrian! How predictable and boring! Now.… on to a full month!”
I don’t think I can add anything to this, other than to say I get dozens of messages likes this every week from men and women who have read my FREE male chastity Guide as well as those who have decided to take male chastity more seriously and download Be Careful What You Wish For — although few are as comprehensive and eloquent.
And all of them are testament to the power of asking for what you want from male chastity in a way that tells your partner he or she will benefit from it too.
Male Chastity Works
There’s a male chastity forum out there — I won’t mention the name — but on the front page it says, “Everyone is a real person, living real lifes and sharing real experiences”; and then inside there’s the biggest collection of airheaded male-chastity fantasists I’ve ever seen (clue: one poor, deluded fool was insisting he’d heard of someone being locked against his will in a male chastity belt that modern science and engineering was unable to remove without using liquid nitrogen, which was of course too dangerous. Real life male chastity, huh?).